Hi and welcome to this blog where is about parenting practices of different cultures and parenting styles.
This blog touches on the cultural differences of different cultural around the world. We will be looking into the Western and Eastern way of parenting styles such as from German, American, Malaysian, Japanese and Vietnamese;  also the way of bringing up their children.

What is parenting?
 Parenting is the process of taking care of children until they are old enough to take care of    themselves. In a simple term it means the things that parents do to raise a child.

The difference of Parenting Style and Parenting Practices.
Parenting style and Parenting practices are almost the same thing. But do you know there is a distinguish differences between them.
Parenting Practices refer to specific things that parents do while raising their children. These can refer to the imposing and use of schedules, rules, expectations, punishments, rewards, etc. Basically, parenting practices can refer to any type of regular interaction that a parent has with their children.
Whereas for parenting style is psychological construct representing standard strategies that parents use in their child rearing. The quality of parenting can be more essential than the quantity of time spent with the child. There are four common parenting style that are practice throughout the word which are Authoritarian, Authoritative, Permissive and Neglecting.

Collectivist vs Individualist

 Collectivist : value interdependence. They promote group and societal goals and duties, and blending in with group identity, with achievement attributed to mutual support

 Individualist : value independence. They promote personal ideals, strengths, and goals, pursued in competition with others, leading to individual achievement and finding a unique identity.

German Parenting Style

Germany has many different cultures due to the vast majority of people who had moved in the country and gain the citizenship there. Even though there many kinds of practices there, the strong German culture will be adopted by them as they learn the Germans' lifestyle. So now I will be focusing on the true Germans' parenting practices. 

We often have the impression that Germans are rather cold and strict but when it comes to parenting they are rather laid back. According to Sara Zaske, mothers in Germany, “place a high value on independence and responsibility” (Sara Zaske, How To Parent Like A German) This is why children in Germany walk to school and often allowed to play in the park without any supervision at the age of 5. Germany is considered as a children’s paradise because the early childhood educational system are based on free-play rather than academics (The German Way & More, http://www.german-way.com/history-and-culture/education/). In this sense, they are used to finding something to do rather than being told what to do. So all the kindergartens in Germany are about playing and not focusing on reading or writing alphabets and numbers.

There is no expectation that the kids will have any basic knowledge of letters or numbers when they start first grade, the criteria to enter first grade was social readiness and being able to hold a pen or pencil properly which is very different from many other countries. Germans take their kids out every day even when the weather is cold. The playgrounds are everywhere and it is not just an ordinary playground, there are giant play structures, zip lines, creative rides, ponds and sandboxes. By exposing the child outdoor, Germans believe that playing in a natural environment boosts the physical and cognitive development of a child. 

From the value and parenting style that Germans conduct, it is obvious that it based on individualist cultures where independence and responsibility is taught when parents allow their child to walk and play on their own, it’s not because their parents do not care about them but instead they trust that the child are capable of doing things responsibly. Besides that, the child is motivated by own needs, preferences and rights rather than what they are told to do or by other people. They are free to do what they want and being able to express their feelings or thoughts freely.

Source :http://time.com/3720541/how-to-parent-like-a-german/
             http://www.germany.info/Vertretung/usa/en/04__W__t__G/02/05/Feature__5.html

American Parenting Style

Asian American

                             

In America,Asian American society emphasizes interdependence, group solidarity, social hierarchy, and personal humility. Teenagers are at the stage in their lives where they want to break free from parental control and assert their own independence. Studies have shown that this assertion of independence can result in greater conflict and “less cohesion with their parents, often with direct negative effects on their psychological well-being”. This effect may be seen more in the cultural demands of Asian American parents.

 Asian Americans, on the other hand, have a completely different view on personal autonomy. The focus on an interdependent view of the self is what drives Asian American parents to ensure that their children develop a sense of contentedness with their families’ Personal autonomy is ignored as Asian American parents place a strong emphasis on obedience, reliability, proper behavior, social obligation, and group achievement.

 In contrast to Caucasian Americans, Asian American parents often remind children of past transgressions and invoked moral standards and social norms. This results in future obedience and a sense of shame, which may also lead to a decrease in self-esteem. These reprimands act to convey social norms and behavioural standards rather than allow for the child to freely express himself. Furthermore, Asian Americans place an important emphasis on the family unit Adherence to authority reinforces the child’s place and security within the family. Children are expected to obey and respect authority, get along with others, and learn good moral character. Asian American parents were more likely to adopt an authoritarian parenting style.

Source:http://repository.cmu.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi

Caucasian American

                           

Caucasian American society embraces independence and emphasizes self-expression, personal uniqueness, and self-sufficiency. Beside that Caucasian American parents are concerned with their child’s ability to build a “sense of self” (mean that a character may not truly know who he is but he always knows who he thinks he is.). The child’s ability to gain independence, assertiveness, and self-expression at an early age is emphasized by their parent. Children are offered choices in their daily lives in order to encourage them to practice asserting themselves. 

Being able to actively influence their own lives provides these children with a strong sense of self in that it allows them to feel that they are in control of their lives. This feeling of control, in turn, strengthens their self-esteem and makes them happier. Rather than remind children of past experiences that may hurt their self-esteem or make them feel ashamed, thus Caucasian American parents tend to remind children of past experiences that are of entertainment and affirmation. This acts to protect the child’s self-esteem even further. Caucasian American parents were not found to be more likely to adopt the more authoritative to permissive parenting styles.

Source:http://repository.cmu.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?

Chinese American

Chinese American culture is largely influenced by Confucian philosophy. This philosophy emphasizes respect for authority, devotion to parents, emotional restraint, and the importance of education. With this the Chinese parenting practices are based on the concepts of chiao shun (is to train the children) and guan (to govern and to love of their children). Parents who want to train their children are very involved in their children’s lives; they show high levels of concern for them. For Chinese Americans, parenting becomes more difficult in the years following immigration. Physical discipline and other practices typical in China are less accepted in the United States.

Expectations for Chinese American children are high such as adolescents are responsible for many family functions, including they have to care for siblings and family members, cleaning the home environment, and cooking meals. A child’s duty to the family is an accepted norm in Chinese American households. Chinese parents are not necessarily driven to control their children; instead, they are expected to teach their children how to maintain harmony with others. For example, emotional expression is considered harmful to one’s health and relationships, and children are encouraged to avoid it. •Such practices create the context for “saving face.” This value or behavior is related to shame because it rewards conformity to society’s expectations for propriety and harmony.

For the Chinese American they are practicing 2 parenting style that is the authoritarian and the authoritative parenting style. Authoritarian parenting style, is an approach to child-rearing that is usually not associated with the best academic and emotional child outcomes. Authoritative parenting style is which the parents produce children who are more independent and self-reliant. It's true for many Westerners, and it's also true for many Chinese. When Chinese kids are raised by authoritative parents, they do as well or better than Chinese kids from authoritarian homes.

Parenting style between American and British.

Japanese Parenting Style

Many of us are amazed by how Japanese children are so calm and controlled all the time even when they are in public. Japanese considers children as virtuous and innocent as they believed that only the outside world is the main elements that influence youths to change (Lombardo, 2014). A unique parenting approach is used to provide careful pruning, nurturing and training.

First the parents will teach the child dependency where mothers are with their children, almost always, for the first two years of the child’s life. Japanese mothers only spend average of 2 hours per week away from their baby so things like babysitters, movie nights away from the baby, or trips just for the parents aren’t common and not well accepted in Japanese culture. The bond between a mother and her child is strong because they sleep and bath together until the child is 12 year’s old. Mothers are also often responsible for disciplining the children by explaining the consequences of a child's actions with no anger being display.

After building a strong bond, it is easier for the mothers to teach the child independence. Besides that, due to the safety and low crime rate in Japan allows parents to let their child to walk home, take the subway or bus and run errands all by themselves. By doing so the parents won’t be with the child so that the child could learn how to solve problems on their own. Japanese parents also expect children to do more chores around the house at a younger age according to ABC News report. Therefore, with the guidance of parents and the safe surroundings allow the children to have the opportunity to be more self-reliant. 

Self-discipline is also an important value that Japanese parents teach their child, the term used for the word 'discipline' is 'shitsuke'. According to Nobuko Uchida, many Japanese parents prefer to teach their children 'shitsuke' by doing daily activities together such as preparing food while having conversation together. Children tend to learn how to behave in different circumstances by following how their parents act rather than learning through correction or criticism. Moreover, schools also encourage 'shitsuke' by having their students to clean their own classroom and dishes every day. This encourages the child to learn step by step how to clean up after themselves and prepare them for the future. 

Japanese children also learn how to be group-oriented where individual is less important than a group. This is why children are conscious on being accepted into a group and they would consider their own actions so that it won’t affect or upset others. So, when they behave badly, it is common to how Japanese parents complain in ways such as “You make me feel bad. You make me ashamed.” or “What will other people think? What will other people say?” Hence, the Japanese society is orderly, peaceful, and harmonious because the children are raised to think about how their attitude affects their parents and others.

It is obvious that Japan practices collectivist culture that value interdependence where they learn how to be group-oriented and conscious on being accepted in a group. Other than that, they are also dependent towards their mothers who only spend average of 2 hours per week away from them. Lastly, Japanese listen to the authority very much this is why Japan is so safe, the people are well- mannered and they keep their country clean because authority plays an important role in their lives.

Source : http://plantingseedsbook.org/japanese-child-rearing-practices/
              http://www.brianlosullivan.com/blog/japanese-parenting-style/

Vietnamese Parenting Style

                                                  Parenting Culture in Vietnam.   

Vietnam is a one of the special country that existed in South East Asian. Vietnamese culture is very complex, in part due to the involvement of many groups in Vietnamese history. As we know Western culture promotes individuality, the family unit is very important in Vietnamese culture. This emphasis on collectively includes an obligation to provide for the welfare of family members. Family members are expected to work and behave for the good of their community. Families may publicly criticize a member who is ill behaved; they may also know as family achievements. Each member has a designated kinship term, and these are used when addressing one another.

Even though the family is seen as a unit, the father or an older male has the highest responsibility and acts as an authority leader while delegating tasks and involving others in the decision making.  From a very young age, the father and other family members educate the children on “filial piety,” a key part of Vietnamese culture which requires that children give parents and elders respect, love, and care.

In Vietnam, the family is consist of  patriarchal ( relating to, or characteristic of a system of society or government controlled by men ) , patrilineal ( based on relationship to the father or descent through the male line ), and patrilocal ( relating to a pattern of marriage in which the couple settles in the husband's home or community ) . It is often we could see family members with two to four generations lives under one roof. There is the immediate family and the extended family. In Vietnam, the immediate family is the nuclear family plus the husband's parents and the grown sons' spouses and children. Grandparents help with childcare and children help with chores. Younger siblings are to respect and obey older siblings, and aunts and uncles, which also are treated as their parent as well.

Source: https://ethnomed.org/culture/vietnamese/vietnamese-cultural-profile 

In Vietnamese society, the father is the head and the leader of the family. However, unlike the father in traditional Chinese society, who is empowered, at least theoretically, with absolute rights over his children and wife, the Vietnamese father shares with his wife and children collective and bilateral responsibility, legally, morally, and spiritually.

• Parents & Child 

In the relationship between parents and children, as well as between husband and wife, the Vietnamese people maintain most of their own custom and tradition, despite the great influence of Chinese culture and Confucian doctrine. In the eyes of the children, the Vietnamese mother has the same status as the father. She is also having the power of love and the spirit of self-denial and sacrifice.

Vietnamese parents consider it a most important responsibility to brought up their children. By virtue of the principle of collective responsibility, the parents will bear and face the disgrace brought about by the activities of children who dishonor themselves just as they share the honor and fame of their virtuous and talented children.

At an early age, children are taught by their parents to behave according to the principle of filial piety. The family is the school in which the child learns the respect rules in both behavior and linguistic response. Filial piety consists of loving, respecting, and obeying one's parents. Talking back or acting rebelliously to the wishes of one's parents is evidence of lack of filial piety. For the Vietnamese, the obligation to obey his parents does not end with coming of age or marriage. Filial piety also means solicitude and support to one's parents, chiefly in their old age. Vietnamese elderly people will never live by themselves or in nursing homes but with one of their children, usually their eldest son.

This obligation is not discontinued by the parents' death. It survives in the form of ancestral cult and the maintenance of ancestral tombs. Ancestor worship is practiced in most, if not all, Vietnamese homes even in the homes of Vietnamese people living overseas. The child who lacks filial piety is rejected and expatriate by other members of the family and community. The worst insult which a Vietnamese can receive and by which he is deeply wounded is the expression "lack filial piety" 

• Sibling relationships

In Vietnamese culture, the relationship between siblings is determined by the principle of seniority, which requires younger siblings to respect and obey older ones. The eldest brother is entrusted with a heavy responsibility that of substituting for the parents in case of emergency. He is considered by his siblings as their leader. Concord and love among siblings is a sign of happy and virtuous family.

Source: http://www.vietspring.org/values/family.html   

Malaysian Parenting Style

Malaysia is a multi-racial and multi-religious country. There are three major ethnic groups which are Malay, Chinese and Indian. Those ethnic group have their own religions such as Islam, Buddhism, Christianity, Hinduism, and Confucianism/ Taoism/ other traditional Chinese religion in Malaysia. Malaysian families usually practice eastern cultural values.

Malay Parenting Style

In Malay communities, there are two types of parenting styles which are the parents who are lenient in the upbringing of their children and the authoritarian parenting style. Parents who are lenient in the upbringing of their children are usually too busy with the material trinkets of life rather than focusing on the mental and emotional development of their children. This type of parenting style usually sets up children for failure in this life as well as in the hereafter, according news from Islamic Insights.Children will do whatever they want in order to get attention from their parents.

Authoritarian parent is the parents set strict rule on their children with low responsiveness. Muslim parents tend to be using authoritarian style in controlling their children. Muslim parents will use verbal commands, guidance and advice to control their children. Some of the parents will warning or use threats of punishment, moralizing and belittlement when the children refused to obey their parents’ rules. If these measures fail, parents will use both deprivation and corporate punishment, according to Dwairy. Most of the muslim children not only accept their parents’ control, but also feel reinforced by the authoritarian parenting style.

Authoritarian Muslim parents set strict rules for their children. According to research at Islamic Insights, this parenting style is not uncommon among Muslims. Muslim children are discouraged from questioning or seeking the explanations by their parents. Muslim parents enforce excessively strict policies on their children especially when it comes to religious. Children are often expected to perform all religious duties. For example, some of the Muslim children pray five times a day without knowing exactly why they are praying and why they have to fast for a month before raya.

Muslim parents also help their children to develop a conscience through moralization, where the feeling of shame guides an Islamic child to stop bad behavior. For example, there are only a smoker in the family , he will feel shame and stop that behavior.  In particular, girls must observe certain prohibitions that only become stricter as they mature into teenager. They are forced to focus on household duties, such as cooking and cleaning, to prepare for lives as wives and mothers. Girls have limited choices and must bow to the wishes of their parents.

 

Chinese Parenting Style

In traditional Chinese families, parents are usually practice authoritarian parenting style. Chinese parents are involved in and also bring a huge influence on the upbringing of their kids. Due to the Chinese culture, it is seldom to encounter supportive from parents. Those who abide by the typical Chinese culture tend to be further authoritarian to their children. In this style of parenting, children are provided with instructions and demands. In addition to that, they are never allowed to question their parents. For example, parents who set high standards tend to have children who are more successful at school. It is also clear that Chinese parents tend to spend more time pushing their kids to study, practice, and achieve. Parents will force their children to attend additional courses class in their young age.

Tiger mother are one of the common parenting style in Chinese culture. Tiger mother was created by Pro.Amy Chua in her memoir Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother. The point of tiger parenting is that parents strongly believe that harsh discipline will encourage their children to strive better. Children of tiger parents will more productive, motivated and responsible than children with easygoing or supportive parents. However, tiger mother may influence their children and they may struggle to function in daily life or in new settings, which many lead children become depression, anxiety and poor social skills because of fear.

One main idea in Chinese culture is the mutual dependence, meaning the whole image of the family will affected by any one of the family member. As the reputation and name of the family play an important role in the society, children have to fulfill parents’ expectation and pressure. Some of the children forced to learn talent skill like piano, dance and etc in their young age. Parents assume that if their child, who does well in arts and academics, as well as sports, will get a good job with high salary sooner or later. This in turn will lead to the enhancement of the family image and parents will feel proud of it. On the other hand, in order to obtain this, it is assumed that the child should undergo a strict procedure of discipline and pressure by coaches, teachers as well as parents.



 

Indian Parenting Style

With Hinduism as the most prominent form of religion in the Indian culture, many Indian families impart the importance of prayer and worship to their children. Children are usually raised up with their grandparents in the same household. Through this way, the child would be able to learn how to respect the elders from what he or she sees around in the house. This is an important factor in determining how the child deals with the people outside the family. Indian parents strongly believe that their child is part of a family and a community and that it is of prime importance that the child realizes that every decision he or she makes and every action he or she takes has consequences for the entire family and community. Since the respect of elders is such a key component to how children are raised, speaking or acting out against adults is punished in a fairly harsh manner.

Traditional Indian families tend to discipline their children in a more aggressive and stern manner. Mild corporal punishment is considered as normal action to parenting in many Indian families. Besides that, Indian parents also emphasis on academics and it leads to the sense of competitiveness in the child. For example compare among children or with relative. Indian parenting not only promoting in respect for others and their values, it also brings up a more successful child. They keep themselves updated about the child’s academic as well as their social life. Parents will know friends of their kid as well as friends' parents. Besides that, parents also will decide everything for their children. For example, the selection of the college, course, city of work and even the spouse hugely depends on their parents’ decisions, if not entirely. Indian parents are often more concerned about what they will have to say to the society rather than their child’s wishes.

 Additionally, the Indian way of parenting is quite conservative. It is rare to see teenagers discussing topics like sex, drinking, and smoking freely with their parents. In fact, a conversation on these topics is often avoided in Indian homes. As a result, children pick up information about these issues from the incorrect sources and end up adopting the wrong path. Parents need to understand that after an age they need to start becoming their child’s friends than being their protectors as they can then help their kid grow better.

In my opinion, it is quite argue that every Malaysian parents will definitely implement the parenting style as stated above. There might have parents practicing with permissive parenting style or authoritative parenting styles as Indian parents or Chinese parents. Parenting behaviors and their effects may vary depending on different culture. It means that the ways in which family members interact with each other are influenced by the culture of the society. Besides that, not all the Indian families tend to discipline their children in a more aggressive and stern manner. According one of my Indian friends said that, her parents are not aggressive and stern manner yet their use permissive parenting style in controlling them. It prove that different cultural of the society will use different way to guide their children. To sum up, most of the Malaysian parents tend to use authoritarian parenting as normative for rearing their children and to promote optimal development.


Sources : http://ppdc1234.blogspot.my/p/malaysian-parenting-style.html
                  http://www.islamicinsights.com/news/community-affairs/lenient-authoritarian-and-authoritative
                 -parenting.html